Sexual Abuse
"The damage of past abuse sets in motion a complex scheme of
self-protective defenses that operate largely outside of our
interactions with others, determining the spouse we select, the jobs we
pursue, the theologies we embrace, and the fabric of our entire lives."
Dr. Dan B. Allender
"...these boys couldn't steal the value God had already placed on me."
Susie Larson, Sexual abuse survivor
What is sexual abuse?
Sexual abuse is any contact or interaction (visual, verbal, or
psychological) between a child/adolescent and an adult when the
child/adolescent is being used for the sexual stimulation of the
perpetrator or any other person. 1
Sexual abuse is any act of sexual power, overt or covert, forced upon someone else.
Sexual abusers are not just "dirty old men" - they could be relatives, grandmotherly neighbors, kids on the playground, strangers. 2
If you have been sexually abused, whether by a relative, a stranger, or
so-called friend, remember that the abuser is responsible for his/her
actions. It is not your fault.
The effects of abuse generally cause the victim hidden shame. An abused
person learns how to live with their silent pain while the pain
manifests itself in other ways. According to Dr. Dan B. Allender,
author of The Wounded Heart, "There are two possible strategies to deal
with the foe: fight or flight...The strategy of fight (angry, man-hating
zeal) and the strategy of flight (quiet complacency) are in fact more
alike than different; both are an attempt to avoid the internal battle..."
There is a battle going on inside the abused person, and the first step
in fighting that battle is to recognize there is one. To live in denial
is no way to live, but to say, "I've been sexually abused" is a freeing,
yet scary, first step that can lead you on a path of immense healing.
If you have been a victim of sexual abuse, know that you are not alone.
If you want to talk to someone who cares, you can contact us at
office@awomansconcern.com or 814-234-7340 and we can help you find
someone who can help.
Resources for Healing:
The Wounded Heart: Hope for Adult Victims of Childhood Sexual Abuse
Dr. Dan B. Allender
Breaking Free: Making Liberty in Christ a Reality in Life
Beth Moore
1. Allender, Dan B. The Wounded Heart: Hope for Adult Victims of Childhood Sexual
Abuse. Colorado Springs: Navpress. 1995.
2. Riley, Martha. Sexual Abuse. Maple Ridge Community Church.
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