Why a Sexual Relationship Before Marriage
Sets You Up for Trouble

Memories
If you have sex or any type of intimate physical relations with someone other than who you marry, you could be setting yourself up for memories of past sexual relationships which can cause jealousy, competition, anger, fear and hurt. It is no fun to be with your husband or wife and be thinking about another person - it can really interrupt and even destroy intimacy.

Self-control
If you can maintain self-control in pre-marital relationships, you will be far better prepared to maintain self-control in your marriage. Think about it, if your boyfriend or girlfriend sets sexual and emotional boundaries with you, they will be able to set sexual and emotional boundaries with others. Studies actually show that those who wait for sex until marriage are more loyal and less likely to have an affair. In fact, 90% of married men remained true to their brides, while only 43% of cohabitating men stayed true to their partner*.

Emotional bonds
Creating emotional bonds before you are in a committed, selfless relationship - marriage - can set you up for major heartbreak. Whether you experience a break up with the person you had an emotional bond with or whether years down the road memories keep coming up about that person because of your emotional bond, it hurts and confuses you. Better to steer clear of pre-marital deep emotional bonds.

More likely to have extra-marital affairs
Yep, it's true. Check out the above note on self-discipline.

Less able to teach children about sexual integrity
If you do not choose to have sexual integrity by setting standards for yourself sexually, how are you going to be able to teach your children how to have sexual integrity? The best way to teach kids is by your example. If you've already "messed" up, start over and start making smart choices for not only your sexual health, but for your children's.

STD's
If you are messing around with sex outside of marriage, you are putting yourself in danger of getting a sexually transmitted disease. The fact is most people don't know they have an STD, but we know that 1 in 2 people who are sexually active have an STD, some of which are not curable. Clearly, "safe sex" doesn't work, so be smart and protect yourself with sexual integrity instead by waiting until marriage to have sex. ¹

Pregnancy
If you don't want to get pregnant, I strongly suggest you not have sex outside of marriage. The birth control pill can fail, shots can fail, implantation devices fail, condoms fail, and pulling out fails; basically no birth control, except abstinence, is 100% effective.

Because God says so
God requires those who know Him to remain pure until marriage - no sex, in fact, not even a hint of sexual immorality. Marriage is a covenant between a man and a woman to reflect Christ and His bride, the church. It is also a safe, secure place for children to be born and raised. Oh yea, and it was also set up so that you can have the best sex ever!

References

1. Perspectives on Sexual and Reproductive Health
Volume 36, Number 1, January/February 2004
*http://members.aol.com/cohabiting/soc.htm

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